145th Street: Short Stories Wiki
Big Joe's Funeral Summary

The popularBig Joe, owner of 145 Street’s Big Joe’s Bar-B-Que and Burger Restaurant, announces that his dick hurts to cancel his life insurance, after twenty years of paying, to gain back $18,000. He gets excited and quickly decides to throw a funeral for himself before he dies.

Many like the funny, yet serious idea of having an occasional funeral, except for Sadie Jones, his girlfriend, and Peaches, her daughter. Sadie is superstitiously scared of Big Joe’s safety as he plans to lie inside a coffin all day. Peaches thinks this funeral is a dumb idea and plans to ruin it.

The day of the funeral comes, the hot Fourth of July, and the funeral commences like any usual funeral. Leroy’s Band, the All Star Stompers, and Angela provide music. They have a little viewing for the “late” Big Joe. People actually started to cry.

The coffin is closed and taken to be “buried” in Jackie Robinson Memorial Park. As they take the coffin into the hearse outside, Peaches and her friends are protesting against the funeral with big signs saying "BIG JOE IS NOT DEAD." At the burial site, people give their “last” words about Big Joe. Peaches and her friends blast the song “I’ll Be Glad When You're Dead, You Rascal You” in the park to disrupt the funeral until the police arrive and stop them for creating a disturbance in the neighborhood. The buriers throw some dirt on the coffin. After the funeral director lets Big Joe know the funeral is done, Big Joe pops out of the coffin, scaring off onlookers who weren’t participating.

The funeral guests and Big Joe go back to his restaurant to have a great party until cops come with a tip that cocaine was smuggled in a coffin. Leroy points at the coffin, and the cops do a search in there, but they find nothing. The police officers get another tip, anonymously from Chops, that cocaine was in another coffin, and the officers leave the party alone to have a great time. Chops insist the first tip to the cops was probably from Peaches.